With You, My Beloved Conde
One day in the life of meOnboard a wooden, sailor yacht…Moving way ahead of the course.Oh, how alone this feeling is,Holding a folded scroll, a chronicleOf what my lord had gone through.In this voyage, with such a disturbance…How my own soul keeps sufferingAt the thought of losing him… to them.Yet, I keep my own head held highTo move forward, to traverse through…A stoic expression, a stare into the distance.I’d look back at the time I was with him…From the time he rescued me from slaveryTo the last moment of confession.I still remember well how my life went downhillAll because of that one man, one of my lord’s enemies…That wretched Conde de Morcef, who sold me away.But it was in that one moment in the nick of time,When the man who would become my lordTook me in, rescuing me from slavery.Though I thought of being treated just like the others,My lord proved me otherwise—the benevolence of him!Right here—I’m an equal; I’m more than welcome.Oh, how peaceful this truly came to be!Such immense gratefulness I have for him…El Conde de Montecristo—my lord, my señor!I felt more than welcome to be with him;Joining him in witnessing plays and operas,Being his fellow partner-in-crime.Though it felt like it wasn’t a necessity,Though I didn’t feel the need to know more,He’d still let me in on the meeting, anyway.Yes—he laid out his plans to me, Ali, and Leopardi.The enemies he talked about, the traitors in his life…Villefort, Fernando Mondego, Danglars—soon to suffer.Ah, yes—Fernando Mondego, Conde de Morcef!Soon, the time will come and close in…For your downfall, for our justice!Seeing how my lord wanted me in on all thisTruly felt like an honour to be his slave, his partner.Heh, I’m no slave here—I’m his partner!Though I’d not want to meet other people,My lord wanted me to be civil with Alberto de Morcef, the sonOf the wretched traitor, whom I gave notice before I ran off.On the night that my lord was to leave to meet up with his enemies,I came downstairs, coming to see him with Leopardi…I would come by to express my concern for him.To see him off, him going out to meet up with his enemies,Such the concern I have for him, with such a bit of worry.If there was a chance, I’d truly wish to continue accompanying him.Our short yet meaningful conversation,Ending with him kissing me on the forehead…As he left, I made a whisper, a silent repeat of his parting word.As soon as things got off the hook, two pawns down;I joined him in the open courthouse…At his signal, I came to shout my rant out to the public.I exclaimed to the surrounding crowd my testimonyOf Conde de Morcef’s betrayal of my father,Of El Conde de Montecristo saving me from further trouble.My testimony proved enough to wreak havoc here,Around the courtroom—what a scandal!So much ranting, so much accusation!Then, there soon came that day—no, this last nightWhen it seemed like our last meeting together,When it seemed like saying farewell.As I lay resting on my bed, my lord came in.Coming by the window, a stoic gaze he showed.I woke up, seeing him in this state.Our conversation started from there, him approaching me…So much confession laid out right here,An atmosphere of bitterness filling the room.I remember how he felt more secure with me and the others…I can’t forget how we happened to approach each other,Grasping on each other’s shoulders.He once tapped my left shoulderWhile giving me some final instructionOn the flow of his plot of vengeance.I remember grasping his right arm, near his shoulderAs we stared at each other, our heads close together.It was one moment of intimacy, even if it’s only a minute.The feeling of security, of comfort…Our gazes, eye to eye, as if we’re both smitten with each other.My feelings for him started to grow at that point.I remember having made my confession at one point…My concern, my well-wishes, my devotion,My willingness to die for him, such the deep love I have.Oh, how I remember his response to what I had said…Doesn’t it feel heartwarming to hear him sayThat he can’t live without me?I can’t live without him, and he can’t live without me either.Oh, how we do love each other deeply,This tender love tugging at our heartstrings.Now, last night… I’d reiterate to him how much I truly love him;So much talk on my end, my own suffering shared…The pain of being alone, without him by my side.El Conde would talk of his own suffering,Unwilling to let me bear the pain with him,Wanting me to go on freely… without him.He’d press on talking of, perhaps, his own passing.Some confrontation with our common enemy,Some physical altercation which could end his life.However, he did keep telling me that he does love me…He does love me a whole lot; his feelings are for me.Though, he still felt the pangs of the past.As we continued to confess to each other,My lord told me not to speak anymore,Feeling such intense grief and loss of courage.At the end of our intimate conversation,We both hugged, close to each other.Oh, the sorrow of separation, the bitterness!And so, it was just today—this morning…When I went on ahead, to the shipyard;Off to leave the country, without him.I hold onto this scroll that he gave me,Some remembrance of the torturous past he went through…A testimony of his life—with his living persona and his real identity.At this point in life, now being all alone,I feel like becoming cold-hearted and numbWith the sorrow of him having departed my side.Oh, my beloved Conde… my only wish is to be with you.I… am eternally grateful to you, blessed to have you.Oh, if only… if only I could die with you there…My troubled heart underneath my stoic expressionAs I breathe on, looking at the horizon and holding his scroll,Until this one moment in time…A touch on my back from someone on board,Some warm feeling from that touch…I turn around to look who is there, only to see…Oh my!El Conde… has returned.The surprise, the silent feeling of extreme joySeeing my lord safe and sound, and right here with me.A sweet reunion of us, my lord and I…My smile has returned; his smile reciprocated.It was indeed a moment of ultimate bliss.Oh, thank God he is back, safe and sound!Definitely, fate has brought us together againFor real, for the future, for life.Our own feelings for each other, no more holding back.Our own heartstrings finally giving way,We gravitate to each other.Losing ourselves to this intimate moment,I have forgotten about the scroll on my right hand…Dropped into the seawaters, to be flown away.El Conde doesn’t seem to mind, anyway.For he himself has decided to propel forward,All past animosities finally put to rest.He pulls me towards himself, and I move to himAs we lock ourselves in such a warm, loving embrace…Oh, yes… our eyes closed, our consciousnesses connecting.Our lips touch, stuck in a deep kiss…The start of our journey together,Away from the tortures of the past.It’s official—it’s finally all over!Our new lives together start from here,No more turning back, no more.As we lose ourselves into this intimate kiss,We continue to lock ourselves in this embrace.Oh, how sweet and heartwarming this is!Indeed—we truly are lost in love, for each other.Our energies, our hearts—all connected.Our love and devotion to each other—like no other.It is an honour for me to be his bride,And for him to be my groom.We are partners for life, to be husband and wife.Our synergy that has resonated for a while…We will bear all the suffering with happiness,For we have each other dearly.Oh, my dearest beloved Conde…With you by my side, I feel at peace.From this moment on, let’s stay together like this.No other human can care for me as much as you do.I’m ready to lay down my life for you,Willing to shoulder the suffering with you.With you, my beloved Conde…Let our synergy be our strength to move forward…Let us continue to experience this ultimate bliss.Our emotions and our hearts connect naturally…Pulling us together, in attraction like magnets to metals.We are truly meant for each other.In joy and in sorrow, in ecstasy and in agony…We’ll bear it all, coming out stronger…Our undying love for each other, our living force.El Conde de Montecristo—mi señor, mi amor…Te amo… Edmundo Dantès.
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